As parents, we want our teenagers to develop important life skills such as self-monitoring and self-control. One effective tool that can help in this process is a behavior contract. A behavior contract is a written agreement between parents and their teenagers that outlines specific expectations and consequences for behavior. It can be created or modified at any point during the school year, providing a framework for teenagers to reflect on their actions and make positive changes.
In this article, we will explore a behavior contract, why it is beneficial, how to create one and provide some tips for successful implementation.
What is a Behavior Contract?
A behavior contract is a written agreement between parents and their teenagers that clearly outlines expectations for behavior and the consequences that will follow if those expectations are not met. It serves as a tool to help teenagers take accountability for their actions and understand the importance of making positive choices. The contract can cover various behaviors, including academic performance, time management, household responsibilities, and social interactions.
Using a behavior contract, parents and teenagers can have open and honest discussions about expectations and consequences, promoting a sense of responsibility and self-reflection. It provides teenagers with a concrete framework to understand what is expected of them and the potential consequences of their actions.
Why Use a Behavior Contract?
A behavior contract can have several benefits for both parents and teenagers:
- Creating Opportunities for Reflection: A behavior contract encourages teenagers to reflect on their behavior and the choices they make. By having clear expectations and consequences outlined in writing, teenagers have the opportunity to evaluate their actions and make necessary changes.
- Promoting Accountability: A behavior contract helps teenagers take ownership of their actions. By actively participating in the creation and signing of the contract, teenagers understand that they have a role to play in maintaining their desired behavior.
- Improving Self-Monitoring and Self-Control: Through the use of a behavior contract, teenagers can develop important skills such as self-monitoring and self-control. They learn to regulate their behavior and make thoughtful choices based on the agreed-upon expectations.
- Enhancing Communication: A behavior contract promotes open and honest communication between parents and teenagers. It provides a structured platform for discussing behavior-related issues and finding solutions together.
How to Create a Behavior Contract
Creating a behavior contract involves a collaborative effort between parents and teenagers. The following steps can guide you in creating an effective behavior contract:
1. Define the Specific Behaviors
Start by identifying the specific behaviors that you want to address in the behavior contract. These behaviors should be clearly defined and measurable. For example, instead of stating “be respectful,” specify behaviors like “speak politely,” “listen without interrupting,” and “use appropriate language.”
2. Set Realistic Expectations
Ensure that the expectations outlined in the behavior contract are realistic and achievable. Consider your teenager’s age, maturity level, and individual circumstances. Setting unrealistic expectations may lead to frustration and discouragement.
3. Determine Consequences
Clearly define the consequences for not meeting the expectations outlined in the behavior contract. Consequences should be appropriate and relevant to the behavior. They can range from loss of privileges to additional responsibilities or community service.
4. Establish Rewards
Consider incorporating rewards into the behavior contract to motivate and reinforce positive behavior. Rewards can be as simple as verbal praise, additional privileges, or small incentives. Make sure the rewards are meaningful to your teenager.
5. Discuss and Negotiate
Sit down with your teenager and have an open discussion about the behavior contract. Allow them to provide input and express their thoughts and concerns. Negotiate any changes or modifications to the contract to ensure it is a mutual agreement.
6. Write it Down
Once the expectations, consequences, and rewards have been agreed upon, write them down in the behavior contract. Use clear and concise language, and make sure both parents and teenagers sign the contract to signify their commitment.
7. Regularly Review and Update
A behavior contract is not set in stone. It should be reviewed and updated regularly to reflect the changing needs and circumstances of your teenager. Allow for flexibility and make adjustments as necessary.
Examples
Tips for Successful Implementation
Implementing a behavior contract successfully requires consistent effort and communication. Here are some tips to help facilitate a positive experience:
- Be Clear and Specific: Communicate the expectations and consequences outlined in the behavior contract. Use specific language and provide examples to ensure understanding.
- Provide Support and Guidance: Offer guidance and support to help your teenager meet the expectations outlined in the behavior contract. Provide resources and assistance when needed.
- Consistency is Key: Consistently enforce the consequences and rewards outlined in the behavior contract. This helps your teenager understand that there are consistent outcomes for their actions.
- Monitor Progress: Regularly review and discuss your teenager’s progress in meeting the behavior expectations. Celebrate successes and address any challenges or setbacks.
- Encourage Self-Reflection: Encourage your teenager to reflect on their behavior and the choices they make. Help them develop self-awareness and the ability to make positive changes independently.
- Adjust as Needed: Be open to adjusting the behavior contract as needed. As your teenager grows and matures, their needs and circumstances may change, requiring modifications to the contract.
- Celebrate Achievements: Celebrate your teenager’s achievements and successes in meeting the behavior expectations. Positive reinforcement can go a long way in motivating continued positive behavior.
Conclusion
A behavior contract can be a powerful tool in helping teenagers take accountability for their actions and develop important life skills. By creating a clear framework of expectations and consequences, parents can provide teenagers with the opportunity to reflect on their behavior and make positive changes.
Remember to approach the process with an open mind, engage in meaningful conversations, and provide the necessary support and guidance. With a well-designed behavior contract, teenagers can develop valuable skills that will serve them well throughout their lives.
Behavior Contract For Teenager – Download